I have the memory of you with me, and I have the need for you with me; but I don’t have you.
Today – A Window to Wellbeing
Today is an opportunity to Connect, to socialize, to network, to build stronger relationships with people around us. How connected are we? Everything starts with real connections because relationships change how we feel and how well we are doing. There is a need in each of us to unite.
Today is an opportunity to Be Active, to engage in physical activities. We’ll think better, concentrate better, and do well in life.
Today is an opportunity to Take Notice of things around us and open our eyes to the importance of a new day. You know, life is actually amazing. Short and difficult, but amazing. And yours is unique.
Today is an opportunity to Keep Learning, to be curious. It doesn’t have to be formal learning, it is more curiosity than knowledge.
Today is an opportunity to Give thanks, emotional support, time, and effort to those we live and work with. Create a culture of generosity.
Today is an opportunity to build these basic steps to wellbeing into the fabric of our daily routine. Choose today and open a window to wellbeing, or ignore today and get addicted to the need for tomorrow.
Bottle Of Ignorance – Part 4
“You are a believer in good, and you think I’m on the evil side,” Jose said. “If you think I’m a sinner, then make me a sinner.
I am no ignorant. I want to embrace him and welcome him but I can’t. I am only considering the people he hurts. The people he ignores. What about them?
If he has to suffer to bring good to the rest of the people, so be it. Those emotions have to exist otherwise there will not be justice. There is peace in justice. And justice is the right thing to follow here. Suffering is part of it. Suffering is a wake up call. Suffering washes the evil. Sometime you need to suffer to get to the other side. The people who love him have to suffer also. The people close to him have to suffer too. The suffering of now for the blessing of tomorrow. The suffering of one for the happiness and peace of the group.
The sum of all this knowledge you share with me is non-sense on my part. I resort to my methods of living and no one can force me to change them. It is I who will decide the change. Maybe one day I will see through your eyes, feel through your soul and think through your mind, but not today.”
“What good will bring more suffering to this man if he’s already living in hell,” Alfonso replied. “Do you believe in justice in hell? His hell doesn’t need more suffering. His hell is the definition of suffering. What he needs is to end his suffering.
You talk justice but I hear vengeance. You take vengeance as the truth, eye for the eye. Better no truth at all than the one of your kind.”
“Can you forgive him, Jose?” Alfonso asked.
“I have no right to forgive him,” Jose said.
“But you chose the right to condemn and sentence him,” Alfonso said.
“I am the witness of his punishment. I am no judge, Alfonso. The judges are the people who love him and experience his existence closely. They will need to forgive. They have the right to forgive him. Find them and ask them.”
“But what about your brother?” Alfonso asked. “Based on what you said, you have the right to forgive him. You love him and he hurts you. He is an alcoholic too.”
“Yes, I have the right but I can’t. He is still drinking. He is still a great source of pain for me. How can I forgive him?” Jose said.
“At least you can help him. A universal force keeps you and your brother together. I don’t understand this force; it is more like gravity and gravity will not let you fly. Gravity keeps you grounded. It doesn’t matter what you want.”
“The price is too high,” Jose said. ”I tried and I failed. For me, he is a lost cause. I better isolate from him, as much as I can. But then, I have the curse of drunk people entering my universe. If I will charge a fee at the entrance, I will at least have some monetary healing. Maybe I will start with this guy.
Alfonso, I need to stay honest with myself and this is me being honest. Do you want me to smile and fake my way of thinking and existing only to make you feel better?”
“No. But I want you to try to change,” Alfonso said.
“I give him my anger and it’s my version of truth,” Jose said. “One life lived in a state of drunkenness is not a life.”
“I challenge you to change, my friend,” Alfonso said. ”I challenge you to open your heart.
Start by imaging that you’re in charge of bringing people wellbeing, making their life better.
Play this game with me now. Imagine you’re in charge of this mission. What would you do?”
“I won’t agree to be in charge,” Jose said. “I won’t agree to imagine such a nonsense.
I live in reality. And in reality I have failed with the one I love, with my brother.
The suffering of such adults is not a concern of mine anymore. It’s part of life, their life.
And don’t protect them. They’re adults and they chose to get through their hell with alcohol in their veins.”
Bottle Of Ignorance – Part 3
Alfonso turned back to Jose and looked into his eyes.
“What’s got into you, man?” Alfonso questioned him. “Judging so easy. You found him guilty and gave his sentence: prison for life, or lock him forever.
You need to put your heart stamp on this. Give a hand to help when needed and, believe me, this man needs a hand.
You talked about your brother, so have some empathy. Think of your brother as the man standing in front of you.
Get a good close-up of his face; it is a human face. Put yourself in his shoes, walk as the other and look though his eyes.
All this bad talking. How many thoughts and words you have in your inner world. You think of them as private, that nobody hears them. This private world of yours makes the man you are. It defines you, so be careful of what inner world you build, the foundation of which the outer one resides on. A hallucination, a hocus-pocus one or a solid foundation.
This drunk guy is not the only intoxicated being on earth. Everything around you is part of you, like a sandwich being swallowed by a hungry mouth and making into your stomach, and you. Be a warm blanket for someone in need. Move a little closer to him, trim the space between you and him, and welcome his presence.
Do you know his name? Did you ask him? You do not care, but I bet he does. Gather in just a bit close, he doesn’t bite.
As far as I remember you, you always wanted to be safe, surrounded by everything proof. You don’t want to injure your self-esteem, to deal a blow, a big blow to your pride. But what about his pride? You insulted his soul, you executed his spirit. You think he will not remember, but he will. That kind of words shot always leaves scars.”
“That’s my way of handling people, “ Jose said. He started breathing heavily, grinding his teeth and clenching the jaw, sign of a rage building in his body.
“Are you angry with me? Shocked by your old friend?” Alfonso asked. “Do you want to spill out your anger? Hold it a bit longer, and do not dare to walk away either. How does it feel? The anger will soon transform in shame. Let yourself go, and your ego be removed from the driver seat.”
“You are a believer in good, and you think I’m on the evil side,” Jose said. ”If you think I’m the bad guy, then make me the bad guy because right this minute Alfonso, I’m close to hate you.”
“I kind of hate myself now because I’m doing the judging. But sometimes it is worth it. Today, you, and not the drunk man, increased my blood pressure. My answer is a little of nothing under the sky of everything.
Some people drink from a bottle of whisky, others from the bottle of ignorance,” Alfonso said.
Bottle Of Ignorance – Part 2
Alfonso helped the drunk man stand up and looked into his eyes.
“I see a sad spirit. A bittersweet look, a wave of old memories, wave vibrating into your mind and resonating into madness.
A warm skin still you have, so you have a chance to save your soul. Save it.”
“Heaviness of my thoughts pulls me out of my mind,” the drunk man said. “Nails, hair, every day still growing inch by inch, but why?”
“To remind you of your aliveness. Your lips are still red, your mouth still let the breath move in and out,” Alfonso said
“Maybe I’m a fine man outside, lightweight cotton clothes, a businessman, but inside I am empty. I’m a layer of skin on top of a mountain of pain,” the drunk man replied. “Sweet dreams have left my nights long time ago, nightmares keeping my nights and days. From time to time I wet myself at night, like a child in fear.
The day I was born was a normal day, not a day of Buddha, or a Saint. A day when a humble human being started crawling to make it. Make it where? Nowhere. Ha, what a big ending is waiting for me and I have nowhere to hide form it.”
“You are an everyday formula of living, a complex or simple equation is up to you,” Alfonso said. “You’ve become a placeholder for a future that may never be, a slip of the present in the past or the future, one is called memory, the other imagination. Have the wisdom to know the difference.
Don’t laugh too much, don’t cry too much. Laugh when you want to laugh, cry when you feel to cry, then stop.
Find a bigger answer to your problem, what you feel now. Find a bigger purpose, and path to it. The big is in you, you just see it as a small insignificant answer.
Why do you want to keep the rain from washing away your sorrow?”
Bottle Of Ignorance – Part 1
Jose saw Alfonso entering the Chicago Art Institute. He didn’t wait for the green light and passed the road slicing between the cars.
He jumped the stairs, quickened his steps, and reached him.
“Alfonso? I can’t believe we meet after all these years,” Jose said.
“Jose, my friend. What are you doing in Chicago? I thought you live in Europe,” Alfonso said.
“I did. I moved back last week. I was planning to send you an email to meet, but destiny is faster than me,” Jose said.
“Walk with me. I have to visit every gallery on the second floor to view each painting. I need to write a summary article on paintings from various periods.”
Alfonso loves art, and he is well educated in culture. He raised his main ideas in life from the land of art. He built his four rooms house in a location close to art. A pink color, to be visible, screaming its owner presence. His way of life was to grab what you want then fight to hold on it. Other than snakes, he was not afraid of anything else.
Jose was his best friend in high school. Yin and yang of the school cultural enlightenment, but they were a team. For Jose, school matter was never his front cover. But turn his book to the back cover, and you will find scars of school of life, love for many women, tips on how to make friends and spot enemies.
He has a body solid of bones, hard of muscles and soft of face. He loves sports.
A married man, marriage was the reason to settle back in Chicago, his natal place.
Jose followed Alfonso to the Art Institute. The smell of art place came out to meet his nostrils and he stopped breathing. His pair of lungs has allergy on this smell.
Phew, stinking hole of time and dead brain cells, Jose thought. I better run a marathon.
“I’m an old art sucker. I married my art. My girlfriend always said – You only lady the art” Alfonso said.
They visited together every gallery on the second floor. They stopped in the last room.
Alfonso bit his upper lip and sobbed at the Rodin sculpture of Balzac in front of him.
“This is a sculpture by Augustine Rodin in memory of French novelist Balzac. La comedie humaine, quel magnifique,” Alfonso said.
“Ohh, Balzac, I know him”, Jose said rolling his eyes. “I think I met him.”
“Rodin spent seven years to finish this work”, Alfonso said.
They walked few more steps to stop behind a well-dressed man contemplating the “Man with the broken nose” sculpture.
“I love this broken nose” the man said pointing to the bust sculpture. Jose immediately took a step back. The smell of beer and whisky brought live memories – memories of a drunk human being so close to him.
“You know, I was a fighter when I was young” the drunk man said. “Look at my nose” he said while putting his face closer to the bust. “Same broken nose.Look at my hands, man. Big hands; I hit hard.” He started throwing punches and moving around the sculpture. “Like this,” he said. Sometimes standing still, sometimes moving in circle, he was targeting the empty space with his light punches. He started aiming at the bust. The circularly movement transformed into laterally movement, left and right facing the bust. Left jab, right jab, then a 1-2. The bust was standing just slightly outside of his range. Next moment he took half a step to get closer. He stopped moving his feet. His eyes didn’t see a bust anymore but an opponent. It was a fight for him.
Then he threw a hard right straight into the bust’s broken nose. Next thing you know he lost his balance and banged his head against the table stand pedestal. The sculpture’s revenge, you may say.
“My head,” he screamed out in pain.
While a crowd gathered, Alfonso ran to the man’s aid. A sizable lump developed on his forehead. Good thing he didn’t lose his consciousness, Alfonso thought.
“How do you feel” Alfonso asked the drunk man.
“Let him rot, Alfonso. You old intoxicated bastard, better break your neck next time. From all places in the world, you found this place. And you found me. I’m cursed.
My father, my mother, and later my brother,” Jose said
“What? Your brother? What are you talking about?” Alfonso said.
“Alfonso, you know my brother. I never asked one thing from him, until he started drinking alcohol like an elephant water. It is his element now.
A place to love, a honest life, he gave it away. For what? To keep his mind occupied and away from worry.
He found a way to cheat his life. When I look at him is like watching a ‘dirt eat human’ episode of life. He can’t put a stop of it, not just by himself.
These drunk people, they are just plain people. Common habit sin in a shell of flesh,” Jose said.
“You are not going to lose your head and start fighting this guy. Too many bad words carried by your thoughts. We all have moments of losing our head: some losing their way and others creating inner worlds in their minds,” Alfonso said.
Kreo of the Day #31 Exist to not exist
You know that you exist and worry that you’ll not exist. You exist to not exist.
On the Road – The Song
New song I’ve finished writing today. It’s called “On the Road.”
Based on the “On the Road” poem.
Lyrics:
You and I made a pact
At the beginning of this life,
You and I until the end
Through dust, and sun, and rain, and pain.
(chorus)
As I lay my soul to you,
Let me ride until I see the abyss
With my own eyes,
Let me be the one who stops.
Wars and fights, wishes of hate,
Wounds still warm,
Pride and praise. (twice)
(chorus)
Hundreds of people,
Every single one of them
Proof of my social existence,
Friends yesterday, enemies today.
(chorus)
Teachings neglected,
Experiences deserted,
On the road, you may find wisdom.
(chorus)
Smiles, thousands of them stolen,
Replaced by worries and fears.
On the road, thieves and traitors,
Profiting from anything.
Road carries on my steps,
Road carries on my thoughts,
My struggles, my victories,
My friends and enemies.
(chorus)
Dust covers my sins,
Rain washes all the guilt,
Sun warms my flesh,
Wind cools my head.
As I lay my soul to you,
Let me ride …
Kreo of the Day #30 Dig through your galaxy
Go dig through your galaxy and make a star.
The Beggar and the Masters
When the hope ends and the thought loses the sense of time,
When the existence shrinks to the point of nonexistence,
When the body in sunlight casts formless and infinite shadow,
He needs a change, a rebirth from his destiny.
He calls to the Masters; he kneels down before them,
A proud man once, a Beggar he is now.
Words, take them out from the prison of his mind
And throw them to the garbage,
Useless they are to beg for his own life
To the laughing Masters.