Today I asked myself the following question:
Can I create a thought?
One, that’s it, now
let me try
right now, let me create a thought:
Hmmm…
I fail.
I can claim
and that’s what I do every day
it’s so easy
it’s my default state
I can pretend that I am
the initiator
the creator
the inventor
the author
of thought,
and to all
decisions and actions,
the judge of the past
and the planner of the future,
I can keep pretending
that I,
this awareness, this identity that defines me
which appears every morning
and disappears when sleeping
without me having a word to say,
that I have control
that I am the master
the owner
of thought,
thought made sandwich
by two worlds
an external one, full of senses
and an inner one, heavy with emotions.
Or I can stop pretending,
maybe it would be better if I detach myself from the thought,
of the illusion that I am the initiator,
to look at thought as it passes by me, but not through me,
to take off my thought when entering the play of consciousness, to leave it outside, at the door
but I’m afraid, it’s a big difference
between being an actor on stage or a spectator in the theater.
I’m afraid that without illusion emotion does not exist,
and without emotion consciousness does not exist,
and without consciousness the world does not exist
and without the world I do not exist.
Ah illusion, necessary condition for me,
I choose you and
I continue to live
one thought at a time
until it disappears
where? In the air? Or around a corner?
and the thought reappears
from where? Around the same corner?
and disappears again
and it reappears
and that’s how I keep it,
until bedtime.
And don’t forget to ask yourself a question:
Can I create a thought?
